Sunday morning thoughts...

Two things that were on my heart this morning that I wanted to share, even if it's only for me to look back on someday to remind myself…

The first thing is this… Is God really my top priority? Most christians would quickly say, when asked or when writing their social media profile, that it's God first, then husband, then children, then everything else, whether it's their job or hobbies or ministries or friends or whatever. Majority of the time, the list looks the same: God, Marriage, Children, Everything else.
However, if you really really take an honest look at your lived-out priorities, often times they show up a bit differently. It's easy to say that God is my number one priority but to actually live it out is a totally different thing. And I was really convicted of that. I had to ask myself, "Is God really my very first priority? And if so, in what way?" It was sobering because, as much as I want Him to be, what really comes first is what is the loudest in my life, or at least what I let become the loudest… and God doesn't scream at me and wave His arms to get my attention. He is that still small voice. Not the earthquake or the storm or the tornado or the emergency… He's that quiet and gentle and peaceful place that I too easily can put aside until "later" when I have a minute… which can easily end up being me sitting down but still fully distracted and not just being still before the God that made me. It kind of blows my mind how caught up in life I can allow myself to get, and lose sight of the One who gave me that life. Not that I forget my faith or stop loving Jesus, but that I forget that He is my first love… What I do is far more important than what I say, and more than just saying that Jesus is my all in all, I need to live out that truth daily. I desperately want the Lord's blessing and favor and guidance and wisdom in all of my life, but can end up going to Him in distraction and busyness of mind instead of arms out wide, fully at His feet, recognizing that He is all powerful and all knowing and wants all of me to trust all of Him, fully surrendered to His plan (not my plan, because I tend to make plans for God ;0). 

Second thought of the day…
As I was praying this morning, I felt the Lord remind me of this:
God's hand is big enough to bless all of His children.
It can be so easy to look around at others and grow jealous or believe lies that you aren't enough or aren't as loved as someone next to you because God's hand seems to be blessing them more than you. But that's not at all true. The Lord is a GOOD FATHER who blesses His children abundantly. He owns "the cattle on a thousand hills" and He never runs out of resources or abilities or creativity! He has an endless supply and delights to bless His children…. BUT, just like with our own children, it's not always in the same way or in the same timing. I have four children and in different seasons and different occasions, they can respond differently when we give them gifts. Like on one kiddo's birthday, another kid can recognize the greatness of the gift while another can see the same gift and wonder why they didn't get one too or run off in and tantrum crying that they didn't get that same gift. It can even happen on Christmas morning when they ALL are getting gifts but they look to another sibling and don't see the gift THEY were given… Does that sound familiar? I'm totally guilty of that same thinking, even as an adult! I can choose to see those that are blessed around me, and rejoice with them, or I can selfishly look at myself and wonder why I'm not receiving the same. So lame but if I'm being honest, I can think that way if I'm not guarding my thoughts. Blarg. It's funny because I can see it in my own children so clearly but am blind to my own junk too often. You can love your own children SO much and yet one child responds to your giving with so much joy and gratitude while another sees it as not enough or wants it in a different way or feels entitled to it. And entitlement doesn't look good on anyone. If my child throws a fit, my blessing takes a pause because discipline takes the top priority. The blessing will come but it may take longer for them to receive it because the attitude needs to shift first. My Heavenly Father cares more about my heart and attitude than if I'm getting all the things on my wish list, just like I do with my own children. No matter how old I get, forever I am a child of God and sometimes my 'tude needs to be adjusted before I can fully receive all that He has for me. 
But again, the truth is that God's hand is big enough to bless all of His children.

And that's then end of random Sunday morning thoughts. 
wonk wonk.



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